More thoughts and possibly coming out....?

I am not a woman, but what am I then? Inbetween? What doese that mean?
Stupid feelings, stupid mind, stupid everything. I feel comfortable with myself, but as soon as someone calls me by my given name och referr to me as she/her, then my mood crashes and I get so low. I think I'm gonna out myself a bit, tell some people that I want to be called Matte or Mattias, that I identify myself as not a woman. How wierd that sounds, "I identify myself as a not woman" Haha, almost funny. I'm not sure about the he/she part... I know what you say in swedish but not in english, hen and henom are the words in swedish.. whatever, it's rescue time! (that means I'm off to play some emergency 3)