Stupid cancer

Haven't written anything in awhile now.
I got home about an hour ago, checked if I've gotten any mail as usual and what do I get?
My worst nightmare.
A notice to attend at the gynecologist upcoming monday. It sucks, it really really sucks.
My anxiety level is like, skyhigh and I don't know where to go or what to do. I want to run away, close my eyes and cover my ears, pretend like I don't exist.
I really don't want to go, but I know I should. All of this just because some stupid cancer!